‘Do you want to meet up for a drink sometime?’ – Learn the language for asking someone out
TRANSCRIPT
William
Hello there and welcome to another exciting instalment of How To. My name is William Kremer. Now, in a previous episode we looked at how to chat someone up – that is, how to talk to someone you don’t know in a way that might make that person interested in you, in a romantic way.
Well, now let’s imagine that you’ve been chatting to this person and you’ve managed to get him or her interested so now it’s time to ask him or her out. On a date? Well, saying, Will you come on a date with me? is really too formal for English-speaking countries. Putting it like that is very embarrassing! Let’s hear a more natural way of doing it. Susie and Mark work together, but they don’t know each other that well.
EXAMPLE
Susie
I was thinking, do you want to meet up for a drink sometime?
Mark
Err, yeah, could do.
Susie
Just a beer after work or something.
Mark
Yeah, that would be nice. Erm, let me see. I’m free tomorrow, or maybe Thursday?
Susie
No – tomorrow’s good for me.
Mark
OK – great!
William
Susie says, Do you want to meet up for a drink sometime?
EXAMPLE
Susie
I was thinking, do you want to meet up for a drink sometime?
William
It’s much more natural to say, Do you want to meet up for a drink sometime? than, for example, Do you want to meet up for a drink tomorrow? And it’s useful because it gives you options. If the other person seems to like the idea, you can arrange a time to see each other, but if they seem less sure, then you can just leave it as a vague plan. Listen to this:
EXAMPLE
Susie
I was thinking, do you want to meet up for a drink sometime?
Mark
Err, yeah, could do.
Susie
Just a beer after work or something.
Mark
Yeah. I’m a bit busy this week… maybe next week sometime?
Susie
Yeah. Just send me an email sometime. That would be nice.
William
The next clip is quite natural English, so you might find it a little difficult, but don’t worry – we’ll listen to some of the conversation again. Zach and Linda are sitting next to each other on a long train journey and for the last four hours they have been talking non-stop. Now they’ve arrived at their destination, but will they see each other again? Listen carefully.
EXAMPLE
Zach
It looks like we’re here already: I can’t believe that was four hours!
Linda
Yeah – time does fly; it didn’t feel like four hours at all.
Zach
I know, I know. So, um, you’re meeting your friend – are you meeting straight away or what?
Linda
Yeah my friend should be picking me up at the train station.
Zach
Oh right, and what are you up to then?
Linda
I guess we’ll just go home and chill out and catch up.
Zach
Oh right.
Linda
What about you?
Zach
We’re – my friend’s meeting me and we’re just gonna go straight out for some beers and some food and stuff. But, you know, if you and your friend want to join us, you know, feel free.
Linda
Yeah, maybe tomorrow night, if you want to meet up.
Zach
Yeah, that’ll be nice, yeah.
Linda
Yeah, um, I’ll give you my number and send me a text and let me know what you’re doing tomorrow night and then we can meet up.
William
Zach and Linda are going to meet up tomorrow night. Good for them! Zach asks Linda what she’s up to that evening. What are you up to? is an informal way of saying What are you doing?
EXAMPLE
Linda
Yeah my friend should be picking me up at the train station.
Zach
Oh right, and what are you up to then?
William
Then, Zach tells Linda what he’s doing and suggests that Linda and her friend join him and his friend. Listen:
EXAMPLE
Zach
My friend’s meeting me and we’re just gonna go straight out for some beers and some food and stuff. But, you know, if you and your friend want to join us, you know, feel free.
William
If you and your friend want to join us, feel free. Feel free means you are very welcome. Feel free to join us.
This is, perhaps, the easiest way to ask someone out: say what you are doing and then ask if the other person would like to join you. Let’s listen to another way of doing this. Martin is asking Claire out.
EXAMPLE
Martin
So, I was thinking I might go and see the new James Bond film this weekend, if you fancy it?
Claire
Oh, erm, yeah OK. I’m not sure about James Bond but –
Martin
Well, we don’t have to see James Bond but –
Claire
No, that would be nice. Shall I see you there or –
Martin
Well, why don’t I give you my number and then you can text me with a film that you’d like to see and the time it’s on?
Claire
OK!
William
Martin says, I was thinking I might go and see the new James Bond film this weekend, if you fancy it.
EXAMPLE
Martin
So, I was thinking I might go and see the new James Bond film this weekend, if you fancy it.
William
I was thinking shows Claire that Martin already has a plan to see James Bond, but he can make room for HER in his date with 007! This is less embarrassing than arranging a special romantic date. Like Linda in the second clip, Martin offers Claire his mobile phone number.
EXAMPLE
Martin
Why don’t I give you my number and then you can text me with a film that you’d like to see?
William
Giving your own mobile phone number is much easier than asking for someone else’s number but, of course, you should be careful who you give it to. This is also quite a useful strategy when you’re less sure if the other person likes you or not. It gives them some time to think about it.
Just don’t let them write your number on their hand. That’s a classic mistake!
Seeing if someone is free at a particular time
What are you…
• up to this weekend?
• doing this weekend?
Making an invitation
Don’t embarrass yourself by using the word date!
• Do you want to come on a date with me?
Try this invitation instead:
• Do you want to meet up sometime for a drink?
• Do you fancy meeting up sometime outside work?
Inviting someone to join you
I was thinking I might go to the films tomorrow…
• if you’d like to join me, feel free.
• if you fancy it.
Offering someone your phone number
• Why don’t I give you my mobile phone number?
• Let me give you my mobile number.