‘What are you drinking?’ – Learn the language for chatting someone up.
William
Hello there, and welcome to another edition of How To. My name is William Kremer.
Today, we’re going to be finding out about how to chat someone up.
What does that mean? Well, if you chat someone up you speak to somebody you don’t know and you try to make them interested in you, in a romantic way!
Maybe after you’ve chatted them up, they’ll want to go on a date with you.
Now, before you ask: no, I’m definitely not an expert at this and I can’t promise that you’ll have any more luck with women or men after listening to this programme!
But there are some conversational tactics which it’s useful to highlight.
In English, there’s an expression: to break the ice. This means, to start a conversation with someone you don’t know – to break the ice.
Let’s listen to a conversation which you might hear in a bar or nightclub. How does this man break the ice with the woman?
EXAMPLE
Man
What are you drinking?
Woman
Oh, I’m fine, thank you.
Man
Are you sure? You look like a vodka-and-orange type of girl.
Woman
Really. Thanks.
William
He broke the ice by offering to buy the woman a drink.
EXAMPLE
What are you drinking?
William
What are you drinking? is an informal way of asking someone what drink they would like.
He might also have said, Can I get you a drink?
Unfortunately for this man, she refuses his offer: she says, I’m fine, thank you. She also indicates that she doesn’t like being called a vodka-and-orange type of girl.
Listen to her tone of voice when she says thanks. She doesn’t say, Really? Thanks! but, Really. Thanks.
EXAMPLE
Man
What are you drinking?
Woman
Oh, I’m fine, thank you.
Man
Are you sure? You look like a vodka-and-orange type of girl.
Woman
Really. Thanks.
William
Chatting people up is partly about recognising when they are not interested in you!
Breaking the ice is difficult, but chatting people up gets even harder.
That’s because you want to seem like a funny and pleasant person and you don’t want to be too obvious: that’s just really embarrassing.
Also, it can be difficult for language learners to speak English in noisy bars and nightclubs.
But, there is some good news for language learners too.
If you’re visiting an English-speaking country, you quickly become used to speaking to strangers – to ask directions, to ask for clarification and advice.
This can be really useful for breaking the ice!
Listen to this conversation between Linda from China and Zach from the UK. They are sitting next to each other on a train from London to Newcastle.
Oh, and I should mention that in the UK it’s not unusual or strange for women to chat men up!
EXAMPLE
Linda
Excuse me – do you know if this train is going all the way to Newcastle?
Zach
Well, I hope so!
Linda
Oh, are you going there too?
Zach
Yeah. It’s gonna be a long journey, especially as I seem to have forgotten to buy a magazine or a newspaper.
Linda
Ah, but back in China, I once took a forty-eight hour train journey!
Zach
Forty-eight! Really?! That’s a bit mad.
Linda
Yeah. China is so big, so it’s not unusual to travel for forty-eight hours.
Zach
You forget really, don’t you, how small the UK is.
Linda
Yeah. Compared to China it’s tiny.
William
You might want to go back and listen to that conversation again. Linda broke the ice by checking that the train went all the way to Newcastle.
Then she said something so interesting that Zach had to respond: she said that she once took a forty-eight hour train journey.
Let’s listen to the next part of their conversation now. You’ll hear that Linda uses her different culture and language to make conversation with Zach.
EXAMPLE
Zach
So, are you err – are you a student or something over here?
Linda
No, I’m just learning English at a language school. That’s why my English is so terrible!
Zach
Oh I don’t know about that. You sound like you’re from London or something. I can understand you perfectly.
Linda
Oh thank you, but I think your English is better!
Zach
Well, thank you very much – I’ve only been practising for thirty odd years! You should hear my Mandarin though!
Linda
Oh – are you learning Mandarin?
Zach
No, I’m just kidding. Unless you could teach me in the four hours before we get to Newcastle!
Linda
Maybe just hello and goodbye.
Zach
Oh I know that already. Err, hang on. It’s err – ha, ni – nihau!
Linda
You see, you can speak Mandarin! That’s very good!
William
Hmm. Zach’s Mandarin isn’t that good, but Linda is paying him a nice compliment!
Did you notice, though, that she hasn’t introduced herself? That’s because she doesn’t want it to be obvious that she’s interested in Zach – she doesn’t want to put too much pressure on the conversation at this stage.
And we’ll hear more from Linda and Zach in another episode of How To, which will focus on how to ask someone out. Till then, goodbye!
If you chat someone up, you talk to someone you don’t know and try to get them interested in you in a romantic way! We can’t promise to make you more successful with women or men, but we’ll look at some of the linguistic issues involved.
Offering to buy someone a drink
• What are you drinking?
• Can I get you a drink?
Vocabulary
To break the ice
to start a conversation with someone you don’t know.
• I find talking about the weather is a good way to break the ice.