Introduction
When was the last time you had to apologise to somebody? Do you remember how you did it? People say sorry in different ways, depending on their culture. But have you ever had to apologised to a King…? Neil and Beth discuss this and teach you some new vocabulary.
This week’s question
What might someone do to say sorry if they were from India? Would they:
a) offer a gift
b) pull their earlobes
c) bow down
Listen to the programme to hear the answer.
Vocabulary
it’s not every day (that)
(idiom) used to say that something is unusual or rare
expressive
showing what you think or feel
cheeky
slightly rude or disrespectful in a funny, playful way
be upfront about (something)
act or speak openly so people know your feelings or intentions (about something)
sorrow
source of sadness or regret
honorific
showing respect and honour to someone
TRANSCRIPT
Note: This is not a word-for-word transcript.
Neil
Hello, this is 6 Minute English from BBC Learning English. I’m Neil.
Beth
And I’m Beth.
Neil
In English there are many ways to apologise, depending on the situation. In formal situations you could say, “Please forgive me,” while to a friend you might say, “My bad.” And of course there’s the most common phrase of all: “I’m sorry.” Can you remember a time when you had to apologise, Beth?
Beth
Erm… Oh, I had to apologise this morning because I stepped on someone’s toes on the tube.
Neil
OK. Well, apologising depends on what you’ve done, so ‘sorry’ is fine if you accidentally step on someone’s toes, like you did this morning, Beth. But what if you do something really serious, like the Ghanaian journalist, Afia Pokua, who publicly criticised the King of the Ashanti tribe? Here’s BBC World Service programme, The Fifth Floor, covering the story:
Faranak Amidi
I guess it’s not every day that you end up offending a king, but let’s say you did. Would you know how to apologise to him? Recently in Ghana, a journalist made some comments on television about the King of the Ashanti tribe, and soon she found herself at his palace apologising.
Beth
The presenter says, “It’s not every day that you offend a king.” The phrase, it’s not every day that, highlights that what’s happened is very unusual. So, how do apologies change from culture to culture? Well, that’s what we’ll be finding out in this episode, along with some useful new words and phrases.
Neil
And remember, you’ll find all the vocabulary from this episode on our website, bbclearningenglish.com. Now, I have a question for you, Beth. We know that people from different countries apologise in different ways, but what might someone do to say sorry if they were from India? Would they:
a) offer a gift,
b) pull their earlobes, or
c) bow down?
Beth
Ooh, I am going to guess c) bow down.
Neil
OK. Well, we’ll find out if you’re right at the end of the programme. Let’s return to Afia Pokua, the journalist who criticised the King of the Ashanti tribe. Her comments divided opinion in Ghana, but eventually Afia decided to say sorry to the King, following strict traditional rules, that she dress in black and apologise kneeling down on her knees.
Beth
Afia’s story shows the influence of culture on how people say sorry. Let’s listen now as three BBC journalists from different countries explain to World Service programme, The Fifth Floor, how to say sorry in their culture:
Ahsan Mahmood
I would say that Pakistanis generally – they’re not really expressive, and we’re also very cheeky so what we generally do is we would slide an apology in the middle of a conversation, and then very quickly move on to a new topic so that we don’t have to, sort of, be very upfront about it.
Liza Fokht
In Russia, we also have a tradition called Forgiveness Sunday, which happens on the last Sunday before Easter. The tradition is that you call your family and friends and apologise for any sorrows you’ve caused.
Son Hun We
In Korea, the way of saying sorry varies depending on the relationship between the speaker and the listener, due to the complex honorific system in the language. In many cases we say, “Che song ham ni da.” This is used in formal situations or with people we don’t know well, and we often bow when saying, “Che song ham ni da.”
Neil
Journalist Ahsan Mahmood thinks apologising in Pakistan is different because people are not expressive – they don’t usually show what they think or feel. Rather, he says, Pakistanis tend to be cheeky, an adjective meaning slightly rude but in a funny, playful way.
Beth
In Pakistan, people sometimes avoid being upfront about what they’ve done. If you’re upfront about something, you speak openly about it, so everyone knows your feelings and intentions.
Neil
Moving now to Russia, the journalist Liza Fokht describes a tradition called Forgiveness Sunday, when people apologise to friends and family for sorrows they have caused. Sorrows are sources of sadness or regret.
Beth
And finally, in Korea, how you say sorry depends on who you’re apologising to. Korea has a complicated honorific system dictating how people above you in the social order should be addressed. Honorific means showing respect and honour to someone.
Neil
Well, there’s a saying that ‘sorry is the hardest word’, but who knew there were so many ways to say it!
Beth
Yes. And it’s not just words – if you’re really sorry, you dosomething to make things right, like giving a small gift. So, Neil, what do people in India do? What’s the answer to your question?
Neil
Yes. Well, I asked what people in India do to apologise, and what answer did you give me, Beth?
Beth
I said bow down. Is that right?
Neil
I’m afraid that was the wrong answer – you should apologise to me for that. It is in fact b) – in India, it’s common to tug your ear lobes when apologising. OK. Let’s recap the vocabulary we’ve learned, starting with the idiom, it’s not every day that, which is used to say that something is very unusual.
Beth
An expressive person shows what they think or feel.
Neil
The adjective cheeky means slightly rude in a funny, playful way.
Beth
When you are upfront about something, you speak openly and clearly so people know your true intentions.
Neil
Sorrows are sources of sadness or regret.
Beth
And finally, the adjective honorific means showing respect and honour to someone. Well, I’m sorry to say that once again our six minutes are up, but if you are ready for more, just head over to our website bbclearningenglish.com for a quiz and a worksheet for this episode. Bye for now!
Neil
Goodbye.