‘You’ll never guess what I saw last week’ – Learn the language for gossiping.
Neil
Hello. Welcome to How To with me, Neil Edgeller. In this programme we’ll take a look at how to gossip – that is how to talk about other people’s private lives.
Perhaps you’ve heard a rumour – that is an interesting piece of news that may or may not be true – and you really want to tell someone else.
EXAMPLE
Have you heard about Mike?
Well, wait till I tell you. You’ll never guess – you’ll never guess what I saw last week.
I’ve got the juiciest bit of gossip ever.
Have you heard the latest gossip?
Neil
So how do you do it? How do you start that kind of conversation? Find out how to gossip in this week’s How To.
The other night I met up with some old friends and colleagues from my previous job.
We started chatting about people we used to work with and they had some very interesting news about some of our former colleagues, Mike and Sue, who are both married but to other people, not to each other.
Listen to what my friend Kate tells me.
What’s the news? Here’s a clue: she uses the word snog, which means a very long kiss.
Kate
Listen, don’t tell anyone else, OK, because if word gets out, people will know it’s me who told you, but the thing is – have you heard about Mike?
Well, wait till I tell you. You’ll never guess – you’ll never guess what I saw last week.
I was just coming out of the building and I saw the pair of them and they were having a huge snog. Can you believe it?
Neil
Well, that is interesting news. Kate says she was leaving work one night and saw Mike and Sue having a snog – a very long and intimate kiss.
It’s information which Mike and Sue want to keep a secret.
So, how did Kate start the conversation? She said, Listen, don’t tell anyone else, OK? This is a typical way to start gossiping.
You don’t want people to find out you have been talking about them. Listen again.
Kate
Listen, don’t tell anyone else, OK, because if word gets out people will know it’s me who told you, but the thing is – have you heard about Mike?
Neil
Gossip is secret, but it also makes an exciting conversation. Listen to what Kate says to build up the excitement:
Kate
You’ll never guess what I saw last week.
Neil
You’ll never guess what I saw last week. You can use you’ll never guess when you want to introduce some exciting news or gossip.
And did you hear how she ended the story? She made a comment about the gossip. She said, Can you believe it?
Kate
Can you believe it?
Neil
Now, this piece of gossip about Mike and Sue’s affair is very popular with my friends at the moment. Each one of them I spoke to told me the same story.
Have a listen to David. What phrase does he use to introduce the gossip?
David
Hey Neil, come here. Have you heard the latest gossip? Well, it turns out Sue is having an affair with Mike.
I know – she’s only been married two years. Don’t tell anyone, you know. I don’t like to spread gossip.
Neil
He says, Have you heard the latest gossip? then he tells me about Mike and Sue’s affair, and at the end he says, Don’t tell anyone.
Just like my first friend, he doesn’t want people to know he’s been gossiping. Listen again.
David
Hey Neil, come here. Have you heard the latest gossip? Well, it turns out Sue is having an affair with Mike. I know – she’s only been married two years.
Don’t tell anyone, you know. I don’t like to spread gossip.
Neil
My last friend, Jane, is a real gossip. She absolutely loves gossiping, so she’s extremely excited about this news about Mike and Sue.
Listen to how she describes the gossip:
Jane
I’ve got the juiciest bit of gossip ever, but obviously you didn’t hear it from me. You know Mike, and you know Sue? They’re seeing each other!
Neil
She says she’s got the juiciest bit of gossip ever. We can call very interesting gossip juicy. This is very common, but quite informal.
And just like my other two friends, she doesn’t want people to know she knows, so she says, You didn’t hear it from me.
In other words, if I tell anyone else about Mike and Sue, I mustn’t tell them I heard it from Jane. Here she is again:
Jane
I’ve got the juiciest bit of gossip ever, but obviously you didn’t hear it from me. You know Mike, and you know Sue? They’re seeing each other!
Neil
So, to recap: if you want to tell someone some gossip, you should use a phrase which makes the story exciting.
EXAMPLE
You’ll never guess what I saw last week.
I’ve got the juiciest bit of gossip ever.
Neil
But you need to be careful too. Remember that you don’t want to be caught gossiping, so you need a phrase like one of these.
EXAMPLE
Listen – don’t tell anyone else.
Obviously you didn’t hear it from me.
Don’t tell anyone, you know. I don’t like to spread gossip.
Neil
That’s all for this How To. Next time you have some juicy gossip, I hope you have the right phrases to tell someone.
But whatever you do, don’t tell anyone I told you.
In this programme you can find out how to gossip about people.
After you have listened to the programme, get some more practice with the quiz below.
Start the conversation
• Have you heard about Mike?
• Have you heard the latest gossip?
• I’ve got the juiciest bit of gossip ever.
• Do you want to hear some gossip?
• You’ll never guess what I’ve just heard!
Keep it secret!
• Listen, don’t tell anyone else, OK, but Mike and Sue are having an affair.
• Obviously you didn’t hear this from me but Mike and Sue are getting divorced.
• Don’t tell anyone but Mike and Sue’s marriage is over.